And so there are two...

It's been a while since I posted, but the news is all good.   This process has involved periods of stops and starts but the last four weeks have been amazingly fast-paced, and other distractions have occupied what little time this surrogacy process has left.


The last four weeks have been insanely and at some points unexpectedly stressful -- one day good news, the next, not such good news.  From the egg harvest with the egg donor on April 30, to whether embryos were successfully created (only four of possible 15 took), to whether the embryos passed the pre-implant (PGD) genetic screening (three of four passed but only two eventually were viable), to the embryo transfer itself (a girl and a boy were implanted), to the first pregnancy test a week ago, to the first ultrasound this past Friday, it has been an amazing and educational ride.   I don't know how people go through IVF processes multiple times, and for those that do, they have my ultimate respect.  Its not easy emotionally, nor financially.   Getting the pregnancy results and finding out whether it was one or two (or egads -- even more than two???) was like getting bar results back ten-fold.


All told, I have been incredibly lucky and blessed.  The dreams I had at the beginning of this journey all included two babies, a boy and a girl, even though I wasn't necessarily thinking I wanted more than one at first.  Ultimately the only two viable embryos were a boy and a girl, and as of this week, the six-week ultrasound showed both embryos had attached and there was already one heartbeat.   


In anticipation that I would hopefully become a father in the next year, I made plans to leave the big firm life, and open my own family law/child custody/divorce practice in Beverly Hills so that I could be as flexible with my schedule and hands-on as possible with my kids.  In typical fashion, I purposely made my plate extra-full, and did that very thing during the same three weeks in which I was going through the embryo-transfer process.  


The result is Bret H. Hunter A Law Corporation in Beverly Hills.  I am very lucky that my clients have followed me, and that I am already getting referrals.   


Funny how things ultimately fell into place as long as I was willing to actively take a few steps forward, put aside the negative questions or inferences about my sanity some have made ("how are you going to be able to take care of two kids as a single dad??" "are you really doing this on your own??"  "don't you know how hard it is?"), and let the process play out the way it is supposed to.   As much as I controlled putting the process into action, I had to let go of a lot of control to remain calm, and simply allow the results to take shape the way they might.  Trust me when I tell you there have been more than a few freakout moments, and I am incredibly thankful for my friends and family and the support I have received from everyone through both this process and starting my own law practice.  :)


Since finding out that there are two developing and healthy embryos on Friday, suddenly the reality is sinking in;  baby names, tandem strollers, baby bjorn carriers, and cute baby clothes have suddenly entered my universe....and I couldn't be more excited.   As of right now, I have a daughter and a son on the way all thanks to an incredibly generous and supportive egg donor, a fantastic fertility clinic staff at Southern California Reproductive Center, and the surrogate who agreed to work with me (who is now back in Ohio).   


Because so many of my friends and family know that I have embarked on this process, I haven't hesitated to provide the updates as they come in -- if it is good news or bad, I have no doubt that my friends and family will support me through it, and I don't feel as though I'm jinxing myself by allowing myself to enjoy the news as it comes in thus far, and openly share it.  If something bad had happened, I would have been just as open.   Some people wait until three months have passed to announce the news, but this is by no means a garden-variety baby-making process.


Am i scared?  Sure. 


But most of all, I am excited and ready to take on the challenge of parenthood.   In the meantime, I am focusing on building my practice, and marching forward.